On Giving Up

Hello friends (it’s meūüé∂)

I’m pretty confident we all have moments in our lives where we try something new, and we absolutely, completely suck at it. And that feeling is trash, isn’t it? You think¬†what’s the point and continue begrudgingly, or quit entirely.

My question is, why as human beings think do we think that we’re¬†so¬†special that everything we try is going to go our way, the FIRST time we do it? Is anyone good at¬†anything the first time they do it? Yes, I’m here to inform you that your first performance in bed fucking sucked, as the evidence suggests that it only gets better with age¬†and in the same breath, practice.

Practice makes perfect. Three simple words that are much easier uttered than adhered to. Is the ego really that fragile that we can’t take when we’re bad at something? I see this cropping up in my own life often. I’ve played guitar since I was 15, but haven’t made much time to do so in recent years. Should I be¬†surprised¬†when it’s a little harder for me to get back in the groove and have to practice the music I look up to play, instead of getting it instantly? Short answer: no. Long answer: You only get good at things by being bad at them first, but by the time we’re self aware adults, we’re already pretty good at a variety of things. Therefore, it’s disheartening when all of our accumulated life experiences¬†haven’t properly prepared us for this very moment, in which we have to face our obviously less than versatile skill set. Bummer.

Here’s the good news: everyone’s been bad at something before in their lives. Maybe you don’t feel that way as a first timer at the gym looking around at all the grunting, buffed out meatheads. You probably don’t feel that comforted by that when you’re interviewing for a new job fresh out of college and your interviewer has been doing this professionally for years now. And you certainly don’t feel like you have your life together looking at a Kardashian’s Instagram feed from your 9-5 cubicle (Okay, maybe you do, if you’re looking at Kylie Lip Kit reviews, but I digress.)

We all have to be bad before we can be good, or even mediocre at something. Have faith in your ability to be bad. Embrace it, because it’s what leads you to greatness.

If everything came to us easily, what would be worth having? And I don’t mean that in an American Dream late stage capitalism way, I mean that in a¬†maybe learning to meditate¬†for 5 minutes everyday doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but it’s really making my mornings better¬†kind of way. Self improvement in any aspect is going to make us feel bad at first, because it forces us to own up to the fact that¬†we haven’t been doing something we could have been.¬†Everyone isn’t already ahead of the curve, we all have things we can be better at. Vera Wang made her first wedding dress at 40 years old, who says you can’t decide to become an avid runner tomorrow?¬†You.¬†That’s literally it. Allowing ourselves to stew in our own self doubt is a recipe for disaster (see what I did there.)

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Keep being bad, and then flourish in the fruits of your harvest later. And by fruits I mean newly acquired skills, because if apes can learn sign language, you can learn to do anything, you big self serving baby. Giving up is easy, sure, but believing in yourself is invaluable.

Now stop making this all about you and go be your best, awful self.

Tallyho,
Jeanine

 

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