The Art of Knowing When to Let Go: Recognizing Failures as Redirections

Rejection, it never fails to cut deep, does it? We are told time and time again how rejection is a part of life and that ultimately, we are meant to  grow and learn from it. Sure, deep down I know this is true, but it doesn’t make it suck any less when it happens. Can’t an introspective, sushi loving gal catch a break every now and then? Maybe like me, you now you find yourself wondering why after all this effort you put into something, it just didn’t add up. Or at least that’s how it feels.

Something I’m a firm believer in is having a strong relationship with your intuition, and to listen to it when you hear its little voice start to invade your head. We’re all more inclined to deem that voice fruitless and to push it aside, but the reason I believe in this so adamantly is the only times I’ve ever truly gotten myself into trouble was when I ignored it. Thinking back to some of the situations that have occurred in my personal life lately, I know this was true. Deep down, the actions of others deeply hurt me and my voice started to whisper at me that something might not be right, and maybe they don’t have your best interests at heart. Wondering if perhaps I was being too harsh a judge, I let that thought go at the time. Then the voice started getting louder. Then it was yelling. Why didn’t I just trust it the first time? And finally, I realized the importance in the art of knowing when to let go.

You shouldn’t wait until your head is screaming at you to leave a situation before you actually do something about it. Nor should you allow your relationship with someone to become completely demeaning and unhealthy for you to leave it. When the voice starts talking to you: LISTEN! It really has your best intentions at heart, even when we allow ourselves to be clouded in reality by the opinions of others. At the end of the day, listen to you. Your intuition is on your side even when you ignore it. And if you do, you’ll keep learning the same lessons over and over again until you finally start to trust in it. That’s something I needed to find out for myself lately.

Which brings me back to the first point I brought up: rejection. Doesn’t it hurt like hell when all this effort you put into a relationship with someone feels like it was for naught? It hurts when you feel like a part of you wasn’t suitable for someone, especially someone you loved. But what if it really wasn’t all for nothing?  Any relationship that doesn’t work out, no matter platonic or romantic, isn’t a failure on your part. And believe it or not, it’s not a failure on the other person’s part, either. What it actually is though, is a redirection. Relationships can’t be replaced or replicated, but what lessons you learned from the ones that end can be brought with you into new ones. That is, if you’re open to a little learning and self-reflection.

It takes two to tango, so I needed to recognize my faults and accept responsibility for where I went wrong in this past one. My biggest disservice to myself? Not listening to my intuition. If something seems off, or something makes you uncomfortable and you can’t quite put your finger on why.. your feelings are valid. Don’t let anyone gaslight you into believing otherwise, either.

And so, I move forward with more knowledge and faith in myself that if my little voice is speaking to me that something may not be right for me: listen. At the end of the day, I have only myself to blame for that. But the bright side is (and there always is one) is I know now when I have to let go. I can walk away from this situation and be a better and more true me the next time around.

That certainly doesn’t seem like any sort of failure to me.

~JLH

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s